too soon

matty and i have been on a whirlwind trip all week to see relatives of all kinds. the day is creeping too close, too soon. i can't believe he will be gone in two days. the overbearing sadness is coming and going, in unexpected waves at times that i am the least prepared. i am just trying to tell myself to be strong until after he is gone. i will have all the time in the world to be sad. how important it is to enjoy our time together while we can. at this point it is all that i can do.